Gahhh

PMS. All girls get them, and no one wants to talk about them. Okay, I have a confession: I have cramps. “OH MY GOD SHE SAID IT.” why yes, yes I did. I feel like I’m getting stabbed repeatedly in the stomach with a blunt object such as a blender. Ugh. Blenders are pretty great, usually…like I love smoothies. I love Daquiris. I love Milkshakes. I hate cramps. Grrrr.

Lisa: hmmmm….. love ya char!! *yeaaaaaa* I LOVE THE FREAKING COMPUTER LAB-OOOOOOOOOO!! (=lifee.)

-that’s my friend lisa, obviously. She has some interesting issues involved with the computer lab. It has something to do with her unhealthy obsession with the laptop delivery guy. haha.

Today at school we prepared for our school fair. I’m in the group in charged with food: Our group leader, who shall not be named, hates me. Hates me like a chicken caught in the wind. Okayyy yeah. Sorry. Cramps make me random. Don’t hate me yet. Wait at least 2 days for that.

“Tears and lies. Tears and lies. Somewhere in the distance a moher cries. For the loss of a daughter succumb to the teens. For the struggle for her daughter on the 8th Grade Scene”

Mucho Love,
Char

A Little Sad

I used to have a lot of emotional issues. Like, I’d break down crying for no reason, or I would just stop trusting all of my friends. I’ve changed a lot since then. I’ve learned that my friends are the best people in the world, and that they wouldn’t hurt me. But today I just fell apart. I’m sick, and I’m stressed: not the best combination. I went home sick, and when I got home I just got extremely depressed. There was this feeling in the pit of my stomach that, no matter what I did, wouldn’t go away. One thing led to another; because I was sick, everything seemed a lot worse than it was…like, I got scared that my friends wouldn’t like me anymore because I’m not smart. And then I started wondering why my friends like me anyway…what did I do to deserve them? They are smart, funny, and trustworthy. I’m just…me. And there’s something wrong with that.

I still trust my friends: and I’m not in a completely scary-sad-depressing mood, but it really made me wonder: Why do my friends like me? If I were a different person, I wouldn’t like myself very much…I guess I find myself annoying, immature, and far to dependant on others.

“A tear on my cheek/As I whisper goodbye/The stress overcomes me/And they watch as I die”–Like I said, I’m not in a very good mood. I don’t mean die literally…I mean break down; fall apart…I wish I could just bury myself in a pile of pillows and forget about all the people in the world judging each other.